Breakers Broken @ Subterranean 5/19/9

Ugh. My friend from the Vindits (see my review on Motorhome) warned me not to stick around to listen to Breakers Broken. Wish I listened. The crowd should have been a red flag, as you don't often encounter groups of teenage suburban girls in all their suburban "see? I'm just as cool as the girls on The Hills!" garb over at Subterranean. Smelly uber-hipsters, yes, but not suburbanite teens with fake IDs trying to look like they're not 17. Anywhoots, this band manages to combine all the talent of prerecorded tape loops of trance-hop with the self-indulgent crooning of Snow Patrol. Sound like a winner to you? Then pop that collar, tilt that graffiti cap, polish up your so-ironic gold chains and ultra-white hightops and move to Naperville my friends, because they must be swimming in this shit. To be fair,  the drummer seemed awfully talented to be stuck in such a train wreck, so I have some hope that when he moves out of daddy's basement he's able to glom onto a real band. The other two, I'm fine with never hearing from again. 

Value/Cost = $0/7 = 0% = F